The Customer Service Chronicles...

WE are all customers and consumers. Customer sevice is a big part of our lives. Customer service is a big factor in the success or failure of companies. Customer service is important to companies.. well, maybe everywhere except here in Egypt.
I get really irritated with how companies, banks, stores, restaurants deal with their customers here... It has actually become a favorite game of mine to bitch out managers tactfully...

Barclays Bank:
Barclays bank is at the top of my bitch list... My salary gets sent there every month. I should be able to access it easily, right? Wrong. They have issued me an ATM/debit card which hardly ever works. The guy told me not to use the card around 9 am because the banks are opening and there is an overload on the system. He told me not to use it around 2 pm because there is an overload because the banks are closing. He told me not to use it around 5 pm because the auditors are using the system and therefore it is overloaded. He also told me not to try using the card more than once, because sometimes the system will record the transaction and give me no money.. so I lose that.
So, that leaves me with about 30 minutes a day that the system could potentially not be overloaded.. During those times, finding an ATM is not the easiest or you find a machine and there is no cash in it. The Barclays cards seem to not like the Barclays machines and I have actually had Barclays bank employees ask me to go use the CIB ATM to withdraw money.
So, I gave up on the card. I try to get my ass into one of the Barclays branches before closing time to withdraw money. The past 6 times (SIX TIMES) I went into a branch I was not able to withdraw money because the FUCKING SYSTEM WAS DOWN!!!!!
So, my money gets put into a bank account that I cannot access... I phone the managers and bitch at them and want to scream and shout and spew profanities. So, I decide to close my account and force my school to pay me in cash... Well I could not close my account because the FUCKING SYSTEM IS DOWN!!!
So, I sit with the manager and tell him I am pissed and bitter and really want to see the good point of Barclays.. I told him to sell Barclays bank to me. Tell me the 3 things that Barclays kicks ass in... Mr. Manager told me he can't list 3 things... I left.
So, I just went to the bank yesterday and found out that money in Barclays in inaccesible for 10 days. I asked them how they could do that without informing us. They said there is a sign on the ATM. I told him I meant, why weren't we informed that we would not be able to access cash for 10 days BEFORE we were not able to access cash.. and he just gave me that look which I know meant "this is a bitchy customer asking for the fucking royal treatment"..
So, I guess being warned that you will not be able to get your money from a bank for 10 days throught the ATMs or even the branches is a bit too much to ask.. I mean, why would someone want to be warned that they will be financially fucked for 10 days!!


EgyptAir:
Who doesn't have a story about how crappy EgyptAir is..? Well, I actually used to like EgyptAir. They were great when I flew to Egypt last time. So, I went to Luxor a while back. I bought my ticket and all was great. While in Luxor I found out that EgyptAir overchargeed me for my ticket. They did not give me the 20% discount that Egyptians get. I hate being overcharged. It makes me feel like an idiot. I ask for the refund and they say I have to get it when I get back to Cairo. So, I get back to Cairo and go to the office that issued my ticket. I speak to the manager and tell him that I want a refund of the amount that they overcharged me. The manager laughed and my stupidity and said no. He said no! I seriously do not understand how a manager can say no when they overcharge you.. Anyway, his face changes when he notices that I don't see the humor in what is happening. He tells me that there is a lot of beuracracy that will not allow him to refund the money. So, I tell him to call whoever it is he needs to call and get the refund. I told him it is not my problem that they did not give it to me. He said I do not look Egyptian therefore it is not their fault. I asked him for a picture of what an Egyptian should look like to get the discount for Egyptians. He said it is applicable to all Egyptians. So, I said therefore I should have been given the discount. He says yes, but he does not know that I had any proof at the time that I was Egyptian. I laugh at his stupiduty and tell him to give me his managers number because I don't know how to talk with idoit managers like himself.. he asks me to give him a few days and he will get back to me. I agree. He calls me a few days later telling me that he will give me a voucher for the amount I was overcharged. I tell him that is not good because I paid cash and that is how I want it.. I also told him that I have no plans to fly his esteemed airline again because stupidity and incompetancy makes me lose faith in an airline. I tell him to go back to that manager and tell him a voucher is not gonna cut it. He calls me and tells me the manager refused. So, I thank him for his efforts and ask for his manager's number. I get the number and am told to call him the next day as he has already left the office. I hang up and call the manager. He is there. (Lying EgyptAir bastard!!) So, I tell him what happened and tell him I want the money refunded. He tells me that my Arabic is not good and that is why they did not know that I am Egyptian. I ask for the Arabic proficiency exam that determines if the Egyptian's Arabic is good enough to warrant receiving the discount or not. He tells me that the discount applies to all Egyptians. I inform him that therefore I do qualify and that I have been overcharged. I tell him my name is quite Egyptian and should have made them think that I might be Egyptian. He tells me I could be Syrian. I tell him he is not making sense. I get bitter and frustrated. I let him know that I don't really give a shit about the money that they will refund. I tell him that it is a matter of principle. I tell him that I seriously don't understand how a company can do this and make it such a hassle for the customers. I tell him that he should reimburse the money without such a headache to do so. I tell him that I am actually quite vocal and I promise him that I will tell people about how crappy they are. I ask him to google EgyptAir and count the negative reviews about the company and to count the positive ones. I assure him that the ratio will not be in his favor. I tell him that even EgyptAir knows that they suck which is why they are spending a lot of money trying to get an advertising agency to redo their whole image. I tell him that the only way to change the crappy reputation they have is by changing the crappy customer service they offer. He accuses me of trying to blackmail him. I ask him to google the definition of blackmail before he tries to use big words he does not understand. I explain to him what word of mouth advertising is and and how it is more powerful than any ad campaign they will run. He tries to show off his proficiency in English by mentioning that he studied in the UK for a while... I laugh at him and assure him my English proficiency is most likely gonna kick his proficiency's ass... I ask him to stop talking out of his ass because I take everything he says to be the opinion of EgyptAir and not his personal opinions. I tell him how crappy of an image he is portraying. He says some bullshit about his expertise and how he will not be blackmailed by me. I remind him that the call is monitored for quality assurance and ask him to give me the name and number of his manager because I am surprised and shocked and they off topic and pointless arguements he is making. He attempts to spew more bullshit and I tell him that I want an answer and no more bullshit. I ask him to tell me that he will either refund the money, not reund the money, or he needs more time to answer. He takes my number and says he will call me back. 20 minutes later the general manager's office calls me to apologize and tells me that I can have the refund any way that I would like and that I can pick it up at my earliest convenience from the branch that issued my ticket....
Yes, I did get my refund and an apology from EgyptAir for their stupidity!!

I2:
I bought a Nokia phone. It was a sexy 6500 slide. I was in love with it. It was sleek. It had a great camera. I was happy... until I made some calls and realized that the sound was terrible. There was an echo. The phone would freeze a lot. I took it into i2 to have it repaired. I waited 45 minutes in a smelly waiting room to drop off my phone. My turn comes up and I go into the tech room. The guys ignore me for a few minutes because they are joking about some shit. I ask them to put their conversation on hold and do their job. They are not happy. I tell them that they cannot make a person wait 45 minutes and expect them to be happy. I tell him what is wrong with the phone and I leave it with them. He tells me to call the next day to ask about when it will be done. I tell him to keep the phone as long as they need to and just to call me when it is done because running aftera phone is not easy because I was busy at work those days. He sid that they could not do that because the cost of calling people to inform them that their phone was ready was too high for the company to do so. I told him that they should add 30 piasters to the cost of the warranty and have the customers bear the cost of the phone calls. (He did not see my sarcasm)...
So, I call everyday for 3 days and it is not ready. I call on the 4th day and they say it is ready. I ask the guy what I need to send with the driver to collect the phone. He tells me that I just need the paper they gave me when they took it. I tell him that I will send the driver then. I hang up. My driver goes to i2 and they tell him the phone is not ready. He comes baack to me and I call the man up again and he says the phone was fixed and in the branch but it was not logged into the computer system and therefore could not be released. He told me I could send my driver back now to get it. I inform him that he cannot make people run errands multiple times because he is incompetant in his work. He should have told me earlier to send the driver in an hour or two. He makes some asshole comment about the fact that he doesn't understand why I am complaining because I am not the one who went. I ask that guy what his name was and he refused to tell me. I ask him what his manager's name was and he tells me that that is confidential information. I tell him that a customer service manager's name is not confidential information. I tell him that I will go to the head office and that I am sure I will be able to get her name. I guess he is scared so he tells me his name and his manager's name. He tries very hard to make things better, but I am a bitch and I was pissded. So, I get dressed and head to i2. I speak with the manager and ask him to explain the customer service training. I ask him to explain how all the events that occured could happen. I ask him to explain their policies regarding customer service. I explain how they are fucking up the Nokia brand image and that this is not fair of them to do. I ask him some other questions. I ask to file a complaint. He tells me he will do so and call me back within the next 4 days. I tell him that if he does not find a solution that I like that I will buy a new phone and never buy a Nokia again.
4 days come and go and he never calls.
I bought an iPhone.
My Nokia was not fixed and still did the same crap it was doing before I sent it in to be fixed. I go back to Nokia and go straight to the manager. (Not the same one I spoke to before.. a different one) I tell him about the whole i2 experience. I tell him that I want to send a report to their head office because the customer service is seriously lacking. I tell him that I want my phone fixed or replaced. I tell him that going into the i2 branches seriously pisses me off and I want my phone delivered to my home when they finish. The manager thinks about it... I guess he understands that I am an unrelenting bitchy customer and agrees.
He tells me that customer service in Egypt is not lacking, but my problem is the fact that I grew up in the states and have seen better customer service. I laugh and tell him that I will ignore that comment and not explain to him why his logic is wrong...
So, the next day I get a call from an i2 office apologizing for their mistakes. I get a call from the manager who never called with an apology and I get a call from the nice manager informing me that the phone will be fixed and delivered to my home on Thursday.
So, I got 3 apologies, nescafe, and a phone delivered to my house!
(I got the phone back and will test it to see if it was actually fixed.. hopefully there will not be anymore trips to i2 for me!)

So, customer service sucks... I have learnt that if you demand what you want, be resonable and logical, and don't shout and scream... companies will give you what you want... They do see it as an exception.. but slowly I think if all Egyptian consumers demand to be treated properly; customer service in Egypt could change...

So, go.. shop, bank, eat out, travel... and demand to be treated better!