Mysterious third option..!

I was at City Stars a few days ago. Everything was normal..
I got in my car and I was trying to find the exit in the parking garage.

I was driving around following the green arrows and the following conversation took place...

The parking attendant used sign language to ask if I was looking for a parking spot.
I shook my head no...
The same parking attendant used sign language to ask me if I was looking for an exit.

I am wondering why he asked that..
If I am not parking, isn't it a given that I am leaving.
Is there a third option that I am not aware of....

Sex and Society...

Today I was thinking about sex, sexuality, making love, definitions of what is accepted in society, what is actually done in society...
Most people think that I am very sexually experienced.
Some people think that I have sexual experience.
Barely anyone thinks that I am as sexually inexperienced as I really am.
Why?
Is it because the preconceived notions that Americans are whores?
Most likely.
Is it because I am comfortable discussing issues relating to sex and sexuality?
Probably.
Is it because I am a sex crazed animal?
I doubt it.
I know a lot of people a lot more experienced than I am. Not a lot of people would believe it because they cover it up so well.
They act exactly how society would like them to act..
well, they do when people are looking that is.

In Egypt I have met more women who sleep with their boyfriends in return for a lot of nice, fun, expensive outings.
Are they whores?
Some yes, some no.
Do they fit the definition of prostitutes?
To me they do.
I guess it it more of a barter system. They satisfy the man's fantasies and sexual desire and in return the man takes them out and pays for everything...

I hate the fact that these women are probably looked upon in a more favorable light than I am in this society.

I hate that in this society I am labelled as a whore by more people than I can count because I am not as good at lying, being two faced, or whatever else you want to call it.

I hate the fact that men can say that they have slept with me because their ego could not deal with the fact that the "American whore" refused them.

I hate the fact that society is more inclined to believe them because they are men, and because I was raised abroad!
Just because I would salute the stars and stripes growing up does not mean that I will lay down with every man!!

On a semi-related topic... why is this country all about sex and virginity anyway?
Men are out trying to sleep with everything that walks upright all the time. Some women are doing the same.
These men will rarely ever marry a women who is not a virgin.
These women will deny anything and everything.
It is all about sex and virginity!
So, everybody cares about virginity. It is such a big deal here.

I do think that virginity is a big deal. Most likely for reasons completely different than the majority of the population.

Why do men care about virginity so much? I really do not get their reasonings. I have asked some of my close male friends before. None of their reasons ever made sense to me. It doesn't matter if they make sense to me or not..
but do they make sense to anyone?

Is it their fear of comparison?
Is it that they doubt their sexual ability to the point that they would want to make sure that the women in their lives are ignorant and oblivious?
I have heard that Egyptian men are selfish and are only concerned with themselves reaching orgasm. They could care less if the woman they are with enjoyed it or not.
I have heard from men that Egyptian women are really bad in bed also. That they scream and make a lot more noise than what they should. In other words, they are faking their enjoyment to please the man.
Why do women do that? Why do they accept that? Do these women not realize how degrading that should be?
So, if women are bad in bed.. and men are bad in bed... why does the whole country think about sex so much.

With the amount of thought that people put into sex and sexual issues you would think that at least they had a good reputation internationally.
So, if they are so horrible.. why do men gather around and talk about their latest conquests?Why do women question their newly married friends incessantly?
Is their nothing better to talk or think about?

If everybody is thinking about it, the majority are talking about it, and quite a few are doing it.. why is it not accepted in this society?

Haves, Have Enoughs, and the Have Nots!

Today I saw a lot of extremely poor people. I saw them everywhere. In all parts of the city.
A lot of them were smiling.

I appreciate these people so much. They make a life out of almost nothing, and they embrace their lives.
They are not bitter.
They are happy...

They are happy being a "have-not" in the midst of so many "haves"! I guess I always was a "have enough" and that makes it easy for me to appreciate these people.
I was close enough to both realities.. and I can appreciate both, because I have been both.

I wish all people can find this kind of hapiness...
Accept your life.. embrace your life!

A complete lack of respect...

A complete lack of respect...

I have realized that that is one of the things that bothers me most here.

First of all, Egypt seems to be a very individualistic society. Everybody is looking out for himself. I grew up in a collective society. The people looked out for themselves, but also for the group.

I see it here in simple things like people being all the way in the right lane and stop traffic behind them to make the u-turn on the left side.
I see it at the grocery store when people cut into the lines.
I see it at governmental buildings where people cannot stand in a line and they are all screaming and pushing.

If people had a bit more respect I think these things would run smoothly.. or at least smoother.

People have a lack of respect for personal space. They have a lack of respect for privacy. They have a lack of respect for me.

I think the biggest lesson I wish I could teach people here would be how to respect . How to respect each other, how to respect order and rules, and how to respect themselves.

Getting to know me.. and my confusion!

This post is just a response to a comment on my last post.
Cairogal asked me 3 questions. These questions are not as easy to answer as they should be. The answers to the questions are just a small glance into the myriad reasons I am so confused.

Nora, I hope you don't mind my asking: Did you spend most of your childhood in the US or Egypt? How did your parents reconcile western traditions (like dating) w/ Egyptian traditions? How did it affect your religious devotion having parent from the west, and presumably from a Christian upbringing?

I grew up in the states. I only came 2 times. I came for about 2 months when I was 4 years old, and again for 6 months when I was 8. When I was 17 I moved here and since then I have been living between the two countries.
My parents got divorced when I was 9. After the divorce each parent lived according to their culture and religion. I was somewhere in the middle. I was learning Quran and going to Bible study. I think each parent wanted to educate us about their religion. Each parent wanted us to follow their religion.
It was confusing, and as a result I am confused to this day. I do not know enough about either religion.
I feel comfortable inside myself towards Islam, and that is why I chose that religion. I do not know much though.. and that scares me. I am scared to try to learn more.. because I do not know what the valid sources are and I do not understand the Quran. So, I try to read the books I feel comfortable with. I refuse to let anyone talk to me about religion though. People confuse me, and they really try to force their opinion on me.
About the traditions, I lived with my mom after my parents were divorced. I moved out when I was 17 and came here. My whole life I was a lot more American than Egyptian. I actually knew nothing about Egypt. I knew nothing about this half of my family. I did not even know my dad very well.
So, I guess since my parents were divorced we were living both cultures and somehow religions... and when we got older we decided on what we felt was right and went with it.
In my life the American/Catholic influence was much larger while I was growing up.